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“I’d have to be a monster to root for that. “A gay man wouldn’t leave the store wearing those shoes.” - Pam A gay man wouldn’t leave the house wearing those shoes.” - Oscar Cause up till now, we didn’t have one.” - Kevin “I guess he’s the stupid guy in the office. “It was my idea to not be raped!” - Kevin “I don’t want to get raped! $22…” - Creed The only thing standing in our way is the contempt he seems to feel for me.” - Nellie “Tonight could be the night that Daryl and I go from casual work friends to actual good friends. Everybody told me that if I moved to America, I’d be murdered.” - Nellie The Red Room, say? Or Dominick’s?” - Robert I feel like I’m being strangled like I’m at some erotic asphyxiation sex club over on I-84. The Office 8.22 “Fundraiser” (**) - After Andy gets fired from the office, he attends a fundraiser and sees Robert California there. “I will not be blackmailed by some ineffectual, privileged, effete, soft-penis debutante.” - Robert “But you’re saying there’s a chance.” - Jim
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“Jim couldn’t land me in a thousand years.” - Dwight It’s going to be pretty upsetting if you don’t.” - Gabe “I think you’re going to need an Asian Fetish. “Do you think I’d like that do you think I need to have an Asian fetish?” - Nellie “Sometimes I wonder if I have ovaries in my scrotum, because I’m pretty good at girl talk.” - Gabe “Nos? Like the thing in Fast and Furious?” - Jim “Does this thing have turbo? Nitris? Hit the nos?” - Dwight I’ll still be talking about geishas long after their bed time.” - Robert “They still want to know who gets the big client. I like to think Lloyd Gross is a no-nonsense guy who doesn’t back down from anybody and he likes to call people kemosabe.” - Toby “We’re actually closer to Binghamton than you are. “Jim? Dwight? What are your last names?” - Erin “Where the hell are Jim Halpert and Dwight Schrute?” - Harry “I think we all want to know the same thing, right? Who’s the strongest? Well, there’s only one way to solve that. “Protein water, huh? You cut it with water? Why don’t you just take estrogen?” - Dwight Meanwhile, Andy makes an independent move of his own. The Office 8.23 “Turf War” (*1/2) - After Robert California closes down the Syracuse branch, a turf war begins between two Dunder Mifflin branches. I just go around doing whatever I want.” - Nellie “I just want motherfucking delicious moment. Everyone is better than this because this is the worst thing I’ve ever seen.” - Robert
This carpet is overdue for a mopping.” - Creed “When I finally do give in, I would go crazy on myself.” - Daryl Now, he’s trying to get me to bring my children into work. “I found out where he got his clothes dry cleaned, custom ordered the same suit made with tearaway velcro and you can fill in the rest. But then I thought: what’s even more precious than muffins? Their own children.” - Dwight Dwight tries to prove Angela’s child is his. The Office 8.24 “Free Family Portrait Studio” (*1/2) - Andy tries to take back the company.